Don't despair and Worry over it - Be Monies Boss not Money's Servant

One of the greatest obstacles to living life fully is money. 

While happiness and contentment definitely can't be bought, it's also true that a lack of money can have devastating effects on anyone, and not having sufficient money can cause extreme levels of stress, marital problems, problems with the rest of the family, work problems, and so much more. 

How many people are not living full lives because they have to work two or even three jobs just to make ends meet? 

How many people are miserable because they do not feel that they are providing their children with enough of the basics, or any of the luxuries of life?

As the societies of the world become more and more materialistic, it's more and more common that people base their happiness on possessions. 

How many possessions, what brand names you have, or how expensive they are - all become very important to you because you are trying to win the approval and respect of other people. 

This materialism, though, often leads you to spend more money than you can truly afford, and you often end up finding yourself in debt, making large payments on credit cards, not having enough money to do anything today because it all went to make payments. 

So what do you do? 

You charge something else today, thus ensuring your future lack of financial security.

The arguments start when one spouse buys something that the other spouse knows they cannot afford, or when someone's not able to buy new clothes for their children, or when payments are being made late and the late charges are piling up or the creditors are calling. 

The stress comes when you look at a pile of bills and have no idea where the money's going to come from to pay them. 

The despair takes over when you start to feel that you are trapped in an inescapable abyss that is eating you alive.

Escape from this sort of situation may look impossible, but it's not. 

It takes time, commitment and patience, and you have to realize that from the start, but it is possible to stabilize your financial situation. 

There are a number of steps that you can take to "fix" your finances, but each step takes a bit of work, self-discipline, and dedication if you are going to be successful in your attempts to reach financial stability.

1. Knowledge. 

More than anything else, you need to know your financial situation intimately. 

You need to know exactly what you owe to whom, and how much you have to pay each month in order to meet your obligations. 

You simply will not make any progress if you allow your situation to be unclear and confused. 

You also need to know exactly how much money is coming in, and if the amount going out is higher than the amount coming in, then something has to change. 

2. A plan. 

Once you know your financial situation, you need a plan. 

What are you going to do in order to lower monthly bills? 

How are you going to spend less, and how are you going to get more money coming in? 

Some people take a part-time job and use ALL of the money from that job to pay off debt. 

Others search out help from a debt counselling service, where they can help you to lower the payments that you have. 

Most end up having to adjust their spending habits, buying supermarket brands which are just as good as the brand-name products, or making lunches for their kids instead of buying Lunchables and other expensive products. 

Do you really need those lottery tickets? 

We all have to make choices when we're trying to stabilize our financial situations.

3. Self-discipline. 

Once the plan's in place, stick to it, no matter what.

That doesn't mean that you have to stop living life, it means that you're doing with less for a while in order to ensure a future that's much less stressful and harmful than the present.

Make sure that an evening out for dinner every other week is in the plan, or even a Saturday morning out for breakfast or a nice weekend lunch out, it's cheaper and you tend to get more food for your money at breakfast and lunch. 

Plan this because your goal here is not to make yourself miserable by depriving yourself, but to improve your situation by sticking to a financial plan.

A day out every once in a while helps to raise your spirits so that you can deal with your struggles more easily.

4. Education. 


And don't just learn about money, learn about yourself and your attitudes and your perspective, and find out which parts of yourself may be contributing to financial problems. 

Are you spending too much on your car because you feel insecure and you want acceptance from certain people? 

Are you not looking for a better paying job because you lack confidence in your own abilities? 

The fear of success holds many people back. 

Learn how to make more money with the resources available to you now...

What skills and abilities do you have that will help you to earn money in different ways? 

What skills can you learn to help you earn more money?

5. Action. 

Once you learn, act on it. 

Nothing is ever accomplished without action. 

Some things may happen, but that's not an accomplishment. 

Your goal is financial stability or affluence, and one of the beauties of the world of today is that such a financial situation is available to all of us.

You just have to act and work on your plans.

The pain of financial problems is one that never goes away as long as the problems are there. 

If you begin to work on your problems systematically, though, you will find a sense of peace and satisfaction settling down on you like a nice warm blanket on a cold and rainy day, for you know that no matter how bad the situation looks, at least you are doing what you can to fix it. 

It takes patience and discipline, and it often takes asking someone else for help, such as a debt counselling service, but the action you take now can help you to pull out of the desperation you feel, and it can ensure a future free from the awful feelings that your present situation is causing. 

That vacation that you cannot take now may be easy to do three or four years from now, and you may be ensuring your children's college educations if you take control now. 


"They have seen but half the universe who never have been shown the house of pain." ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

The first question to be answered by any individual or any social group, facing a hazardous situation, is whether the crisis is to be met as a challenge with strength and purpose of action or as an occasion for despair and inaction.

You can think about your problems or you can worry about them, and there is a vast difference between the two.

Worry is thinking that has turned toxic.

It is jarring music that goes round and round and never comes to either climax or a conclusion.

Creative Thinking works its way through problems to conclusions and decisions then actions!

Worry leaves you in a state of tensely suspended animation and inaction. 

When you worry, you go over the same ground endlessly and come out the same place you started and have gained nothing but a waste of precious time and energy.

Thinking makes progress from one place to another; worry remains static. You can tackle the problems of life and change worry into creative thinking and anxiety into creative action.

It is in the whole process of meeting and solving problems that life has meaning.

Problems are the cutting edge that distinguishes between success and failure.

Problems call forth our courage and our wisdom; indeed, they create our courage and our wisdom. It is only because of problems that we grow mentally and spiritually. It is through the pain of confronting and resolving problems that we learn.

We do not succeed in changing things according to our desire, but gradually our desire changes and evolves. The situation that we hoped to change because it was intolerable becomes unimportant.

We have not managed to surmount the obstacle, as we were absolutely determined to do, when we live our life with a DYNAMIC PURPOSE we find that life has taken us round it, led us past it, and then if we turn round to gaze at the remote past, we can barely catch sight of it, so imperceptible has it become.

As we are in a constant state of moving forward, growing in our awareness!

A long time ago it had seemed to me that life was about to begin - real life.

But there was always some obstacle in the way, something to be got through first, some unfinished business, time still to be served, a debt to be paid.

Then life would begin. 

At last it dawned on me that these obstacles were my life!

Unfortunately, all is not beauty and peace in life. 

That is reality of Living. 

I know I have never met a person who has not been challenged or wounded by something.

Difficulties present choices, we can either waste away from our wounds or use them to grow our minds.

I will use my self here for example, as a young man I am a survivor of a 400 feet fall down a rock face when I was climbing in Tramadoc, North Wales. 

I had my pelvis shattered and the bottom part of my spine crushed and various other fractures. 

I was told I would never be able to walk properly again. and that I would be discharged from the Army.

I refused that idea, and instead worked dam hard once I was able to get up and move again to walk. 

Within six months I was back playing football and within eight months back doing my passion, mountaineering!

And I passed all the Army medical exams with flying colours and went back to my unit.

They where amazed to see me!

No I did not do it alone, I had some truly wonderful people help me. 

Because they saw my total will, dedication and persistence to succeed. 

I have always said that no one succeeds alone - we succeed through and for one another.

We live in a world in which the worst looks as if it is going to happen and the worst often does happen, and yet out of the anguish and waste, love and trust come in new forms.

I could have just accepted what happened to me and become a "victim" and used that tramatic moment in my life as an excuse to become "poor me." 

And I would more and likely be in a wheel chair now. 

Crippled not only in body but in my mind too.

As Winston Churchill said......"Never ever give up!"

And as I say...

"Problems have SOLUTIONS that require ACTIONS. Think about the problem. Seek solutions and solve the problem with taking ACTION!"

Worrying is such a waste of time and energy and solves nothing and gains nothing. 

So instead of lying in that hospital bed worrying and feeling sorry for myself. 

I was thinking of "how and what will it take" so that I could get back to doing what I loved doing most.


And I never took "no" or "you cant do this" for an answer. 

And once the Doctors understood I was deadly serious. 

The attitude changed and all sorts of "help" come my way.

One thing I know about Life. 

You do nothing, nothing will happen for you. 

Spend your time "worrying"...Waste your time living and going nowhere!

You move and act and in Life, then Life acts and meets you half way and all sorts of opportunities then start to present themselves.

Yours Sincerely

Ange Fonce

"The ultimate measure of a person is not where he or she stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he or she stands at times of challenge and controversy." ~ Martin Luther King, Jr.


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