Bruce Lee, Masculinity, Femininity, Personal-Development And The Tao of Jeet Kune Do! 

I recently had a good think about all the information that is around these days for men and women about attraction, dating,members of the opposite sex and even members of the same sex. (However I note there is little real information about seduction and romance) and I asked Myself a question....

Is there too much information out there on this topic?

Have we reached info-saturation on seduction and attraction?

I was pondering this the other day as I was putting together information for a couple who recently become clients of mine, and it stuck with me. I think that the subject of attraction and relationships is to be as easy as possible to learn and to use.

Many years ago, I was subscribed to a bunch of newsletters on the topic of attraction. After a while, it got to be just way too much, and it was making it harder for Me to arrive at My own understanding.

You'll find that lot of the info out there is basically the same. Everyone wants to convince you that THEY have found the answer. What I understand through my study of male female behaviour is that through Science, there has been found a whole bunch of answers to a lot of questions - not just one.

And what most people don't need is ever more complex relationship models and clever diagrams. 

What most people want is CLARITY and SIMPLICITY!

You need more exercises that will actually put you on the path to getting better with both men and women, and in all social situations. You need more examples and maps to find the path that suits you. And that is something I have worked hard on in my Gender Education System For Human Relationships. Making it simple to put into practice. Yes I know all the theory stuff....The Psychology and Biology, that's My field of Expertise. But it's no good blinding My clients with deep Science. They want something they can use, understand and what works for them.

Have you noticed that there are very few people who can give you exercises that are PRACTICAL at helping you with developing your Confidence and Self Esteem? 

Your Masculine or Feminine essence? 

Why is that?

Let's look at the problem. First of all:

1) You need motivation.

Face it, we all want to be motivated and inspired by someone. It's hard to stay motivated every day and all the time. Humans are lazy by nature. The funny thing about laziness is this: We go through all kinds of EFFORT and WORK to be lazy.

How do you think such things as the remote control and the recliner with drink holders were invented?

Human beings put out unbelievable effort in the NOW to avoid work in the LATER.

Each one of those people that invented those time-saving, effort-saving things thought it was a wonderful idea, or they just wanted to get rich. Either way, they motivated themselves with the promise of a better future if they would just invest time in something right now.

Think about this question for a minute then rejoin me. I'll be here.

How much of your time do waste avoiding doing things that can actually make you life better?

Ok, you had a good think?

Now as for motivation, well that's like taking a shower. Every time you get it, you feel great, but it wears off. Tomorrow, you'll need motivation all over again.

NOBODY is motivated 100% of the time, no matter what you may think.

NOBODY is good with women 100% of the time.

NOBODY is happy 100% of the time.

It all comes down to your own fire and drive. Moods come and go, but action speaks volumes.

It's YOUR job to find what motivates you and leverage it to keep you going. I don't care if it's CD's or e-books or 2 triple espressos in the morning. You have to go to the source of your motivation and drink from the well, my friend.

Don't think that reading an e-book once or watching a program once will get you that motivation. You have to be willing to pick it up and re-read it ten times (minimum) to really start to ingrain the behaviours into your thinking.

2. You don't need complex graphs or science mumbo jumbo (Unless your a geek like me)

You need ANSWERS.

There are many men and women out there that are so hung up on the analytical side of this stuff that they get into REAL trouble when it comes to making more pictures of how to graph attraction and buying temperature and social value and... and....and....That is a way of avoiding doing the REAL deal.....I call it PROCRASTINATION!

It's time to put your calculators away and just own up to the ACTION you must take.

Just thinking, wishing, hoping to attract a man or woman into your life or wanting to improve your relationship just will not work unless you get off your backside, take action and make it happen!

To improve your self-esteem, your MASCULINE or FEMININE confidence will require work - and some of it might scare you.

Ultimately, the more information you try to find out there, the more you are really trying to avoid DOING what you know you must DO. You may well be seeking the Holy Grail of attraction and relationship techniques, but what you end up doing is not putting the EFFORT in. By studying instead of doing, you get to feel the pleasure of learning, and avoid the pain of practice and actually relating to men and women or a man or woman, in that "face to face" personal way.

Remember: Anything worth doing will NOT be easy.

Let me say it again.

Anything worth doing in life will NOT be easy!

Easy is for "losers"....what do they ever WIN?

And it's not easy to get off your butt and go meet men and women. It's much easier to sit inside and surf some nasty pictures, or post to Facebook. Watch TV, wish, hope which is well.........nothing.

On the other hand, if you can accept the total reality that if you learn AND apply, you will succeed. It is as inevitable as the day following the night.

When your AUTHENTIC and REAL and workout on yourself in all sorts of ways, things happen, like in the list following.......

  •   Relaxed & Resourceful - Cool and calm keeps you at your best, your ability to connect to your innate abilities.
  •   Effective & Energized - It has power - Masculine and Feminine Power. Raise your energy level.
  •   Authentic - It has to be YOU, and it has to be the Masculine or Feminine you.
  •   Lifestyle & Lasting - Because it's NATURAL to you, you'll never lose it - No separation from your identity.
These are some of the principles I use to help men and women get their self esteem and natural confidence rock solid.

Now I am going to use an example of one of the Greatest Martial Arts Practitioners in the World (Who sadly died many years ago) and his thinking.

Bruce Lee.

Bruce Lee sought to reconcile all the various styles and methods he saw in the community of Martial Arts. He created the Tao of Jeet Kune Do as an answer to this, explaining that NO-style should be your style. It comes from a personal set of principles.

I try my best to perform the same function for men and women today. By providing them with tools that they can adapt to their personalities,their style when being coached by me. From that set of tools they can build on the foundation of their AUTHENTIC and REAL selves to achieve success more readily.

Other methods often require you to slap a whole structure on top of a foundation (i.e., personality) that it may not fit. It makes more sense to start with building blocks of that person's personality type to give them their own individual approach. In the end, every man and women that achieves true success with members of the opposite (or same) sex will end up with his or her own UNIQUE style anyway.

Wherever you go, there you are.

The AUTHENTIC you!

In the Tao of Jeet Kune Do, Bruce Lee's book on his philosophy of fighting arts, he talks about the six diseases that plague us. I think they are very relevant to the art of attraction and relationships, and so I offer them to you here.

Consider also that following any one "system" is only a stepping stone to greater growth. In fact, if you follow any particular system of pick up or attraction (or whatever you choose to call it), then you are also using a "technique," but in a much larger sense. You're using one BIG technique.

Now, the six "diseases":

1) "The desire for victory."

Ah, how this plagues so many men and women. The need for results and desire for a man or woman puts us in a dangerous head space. You must let go of attachment to results, but pursue them to a conclusion.

2) "The desire to resort to technical cunning."

Again, too strong an attachment to a technique fails to grasp the understanding that you must CUSTOMIZE your approach to attraction, relationships and intimacy to your REAL self!

3) "The desire to display all that has been learned."

Wow. I have to raise my hand at that one. I've done this a lot. You learn a ton of clever stuff, and you got to unload it (Which I did many years ago when learning, showing off "how" smart I was and in fact being a right "dumb" arse). In the end, you probably could have done without it all. You just act from the confidence that HAVING it means you don't have to USE it. Like for me now in that all my knowledge and experience is now effortless and is worn like an invisible cloak and part of who I am.

4) "The desire to awe the enemy."

This would be all of us. What men or woman hasn't let their ego creep into their approach or interaction with other men and women and ruin things by being the braggart or boaster?
 
Just Relax and let her discover you. Not get overwhelmed by you.

5) "The desire to play the passive role."

We, as men, must be the initiators. I know there's a ton of clever stuff out there that appeals to a guy's desire to not approach or not take action to get women attracted to him, but the REALITY persists. You must be the one to take action. Initiate. It's your destiny and your birthright. Don't shirk it. And don't get me wrong at this point ladies. I love it when a woman "hits" on me, but you as a woman have to gauge it right and also the nature of the man or it could go all very badly wrong for you. Smart aware men KNOW when a woman is hitting on him and enjoy playing along with her.

6) "The desire to get rid of whatever disease one is affected by."

This one is the toughest to understand, in that Zen koan sort of way. I think what is meant by this is that to succeed, you can not be constantly wrestling with your weaknesses. You cannot let go when you're trying to get rid of them.

You must simply dilute them with the power of your strengths. I think that a big part of this thinking, is that if you focus too much on overcoming your weaknesses, You will succumb to them.

Take that with a grain of thoughtful thinking. 

Desire is a natural part of human nature. 

But in the end. you will only be as successful to the degree that you LET GO, not cling desperately to your style or your techniques and your methods.

Remember, long after all the clever techniques have been exposed, your authenticity and REAL character will never be out of style or a liability. 

You can't get CAUGHT being something else if you are being the AUTHENTIC YOU!

Get REAL!

BE AUTHENTIC!

And practically speaking, that completes this conversation.
 
And remember....always leave a man or a woman all the better for knowing you. Average men and women know only the rules. Masculine Men and Feminine Women know and are the EXCEPTIONS!

For Love, Passion and Intimacy.......

Catch you later

Ange Fonce

What are Your thoughts and ideas?

 "Use the Comments box below to tell me what you think (even if you disagree with me).  I really appreciate it when people reply with thoughtful comments. Honestly, it makes my day. Either way I will be glad to hear from you." ~ AF

RECOMMENDED FURTHER READING....

Do You rush in "Blind" into a Relationship and end up in a mess? Or are you "Discerning" about who you Date?

Deception in Relationships is Natural. YES! We ALL Lie to each other ALL the time. It's True!

What's Your Style For Building A Solid Relationship? To Be Alike - Opposites Attract Or The Lucky Dip Bag Approach?

Sexual Mastery, The Secret Power of Appreciation

"INTIMATE COMMUNION" Resources For Relationships

BY THE WAY, if you ever want to reproduce one of these articles in a blog, in an email, in a book, on a milk carton..GO AHEAD!  You have got my blessing. Just promise me, you will make sure you include a link back to my website and give credit where credit is due. Also please feel free to forward this article to a friend or let them know they can receive their own articles by subscribing to "Intimate Communion" . I am sure they will appreciate your consideration of them.

“The greatest compliment you can give me is when you share this with others. I sincerely appreciate it.”