LOVE EVERY MINUTE OF IT. The Ten Commandments For Smooth Finger Work For That "Extra Special" Touch!

Please Be Aware That This Article Contains Images Of An Adult Nature

Female orgasm has always been a very mysterious experience for many men. While there are some women who suffer their entire lives without an orgasm, more and more are talking their pleasure into their own hands like many more women now do and teaching their husbands how to help. While each orgasm is in a way completely unique, there are stages of pleasure that are part of the experience in a number of different configurations.

Which I will share with you in this article, so lets start with....

Build Me Up, Let Me Down

The natural path toward orgasm can be described in three basic stages with a few significant events. The initial inklings of lust define the first stage, called desire. The activities that bring about desire in women are incredibly diverse, but can usually be discovered by understanding what you can do to relieve stress in her life. Do the dishes, get a babysitter and a hotel room, draw a hot bubble bath, learn erotic massage – there are dozens of foreplay techniques that can help release her tight muscles and open her up to you.

After desire, a woman begins to experience arousal which is usually evident in her body. Increased heart and respiratory rate, flushed face and chest, erect nipples, warm skin and vaginal lubrication are all great signs of arousal, but don’t wait for all of them if she tells you that she’s ready for more. Use lube if necessary to take the next steps.

When orgasm occurs, watch out! 

The strong PC muscles take over, fluttering with great speed as the entire muscular system in the body contracts and releases, letting go of stress and pain, tension and frustration.

Come On Down!

Multiple orgasms certainly are not something that every couple needs to make a goal, but when a woman is able to reach her first orgasm by manual stimulation, second (and third, and fourth) orgasms during penetrative sex are much easier to achieve.

Unlike the standard terminal orgasm, it is possible to experience an orgasm, then instead of losing arousal (and possible desire), a plateau is reached. From this static position, it is much easier to return to orgasmic bliss, whether you can count her orgasms during your play, or they all bleed into one long flood of pleasure for her.

The Ten Commandments

While your fingers are definitely key to your success expanding your women's pleasure, there are ten simple rules that really define the process.

1. Stay Positive: The trick to going all the way is to really trust that you can!

2. Think Sexy: She may need a lot of foreplay to get her receptive to lengthy lovemaking and multiple orgasms, so go slow and let her desire build before skipping right to arousal.

3. Map It Out: Don’t spend all your time focusing on her genitals. Your hands are good for all sorts of touch, so work your way around her body, exploring and discovering new erogenous zones.

4. Lip Service: Your hands are great, integral in fact, but don’t forget about your mouth. With fingers penetrating and a tongue on her clit, you are well on the way to taking her to new heights of pleasure.

5. Back and Forth: Trust it or not, the best way to get her to multiple orgasms is to stop before she gets there…. just for a while. Tease her a bit, bringing her close to orgasm, then backing off for just a few seconds before going back for more.

6. On the Spot: Between her clitoris, her vaginal canal and her G-Spot, there are a few different kinds of orgasms she can experience all in one night. Why not try for them all? Be sure to hit the spot on the front wall of her vagina, just a couple inches inside, but don’t be forceful. Use a “come hither” motion and you’ll rock her world.

7. Exercise: Don’t assume that using a computer gives you the finger-strength to match her orgasmic stamina. There are a number of great exercises not only for your fingers, but for her PC muscles to improve her orgasms, and we’ll talk about a few of them another day soon. Stay tuned!

8. Double Time: What’s better for a woman than having all a man’s attention focused on one of her most sensitive spots? Having him focus on two! Try reaching for her breasts while finger her, or squeezing her ass while going down. What other unique erogenous zones does she have? Hit more than one and she’ll be ready to come.

9. Three’s Company: If two’s good, three is a whole new world, whether she is stimulating her own nipples, using a vibrator, or you are just extra dexterous, fingering her vaginally and anally while licking her clit. This might be a bit overwhelming for some women, but if you wait until after she’s had her first or second orgasm, she can ride this triple stimulation out all the way to exhaustion.

10. Take it Easy: Keep the pressure off. You’ll want to put aside some time for multiple orgasms, and if she finishes with one and is done, don’t worry. There’s always next time!

So let’s face it, sex is a fact of life. But lame sex does not have to be. Many women have yet to experience a real orgasm and are tired of hearing, “You just need to relax more, baby…” If you think you’re finally ready for the BIG O and bigger “Ohhhhhhh!” 

Here are 5 tips to to go with "smooth finger work" harnessing the kind of pleasure that will make the neighbours complain (mostly because they’re secretly jealous).


On your path to finding The Big O, get to know your own anatomy and be playful and experimental with your lover. For many women, the biggest block to insane levels of bliss is what they think they already KNOW about themselves. For example, if you are a woman who has never experienced any pleasure from your G Spot (5 out of 7 women don’t), that does not mean it can’t ever happen… it just has not happened YET.

Be playful, open and curious about experimenting with your body with your lover, with new fantasies, new positions, new ways to surrender more deeply, and new ways to become comfortable enough with your body and your sexuality to make pretty much anything that feels good okay.


Rhythm is a huge part of reaching The Big O for most women. And your partner is likely to miss this… particularly if you are with a male partner, because you have a deeply in-bred instinct for “sprinting to the finish.” Once you have locked in the rhythm, resist the temptation to go harder or faster… INSTEAD, breathe into it, relax and keep that rhythm steady.

The possibility for extending your pleasure, making it more intense and longer lasting (until you literally fear your body might burst into flames and explode into a million pieces) is sometimes all about just keeping that rhythm…right through whatever storms may come…


Climbing to The Big O is just like getting slowly dragged to the top of that first giant hill on a roller coaster. The stress level up there of knowing you are about to drop down that huge vertical track at a zillion miles per hour can be overwhelming.

And many of you, given a choice, would stop the ride and get the hell off!

But you can’t. On a roller coaster, surrender is – for better or for worse – the only option. And usually you plunge down that hill and go screaming around the track in a crazy mix of giddy laughter and terror, and LOVE EVERY MINUTE OF IT.

I remember one particular woman I was dating who had never experienced an orgasm before. The first time I seduced her and we was making love. The intense pleasure of what I was doing to her. become to much for her and she pushed me away.

So for the next 5 times we made out I took her step by step to a higher level of experiencing pleasure. On the 5th occasion of giving her oral sex and finger fucking her. I did not stop and took her right over the edge. Her orgasm was so intense she screamed and I felt her tearing the skin of my back with her finger nails. 


Was it worth it.......Absolutely, I love driving a woman wild and insane with pleasure!

A super-powerful orgasm for a woman can be just like that…(And for some men too) except that when the fear, anxiety, or just pent-up energy is too much, you can hit the cut-off switch (either mentally, emotionally, or physically) to stop what’s happening. So many women will break the rhythm and not allow themselves to go to the place where they may scream the walls down, make ugly faces, drool, or who-knows-what… But after all the anxiety of climbing, why stop yourself from enjoying the excitement and exhilaration? 

The Big O is right around the bend, waiting for you…


So, yes, it’s true. That was really the right advice all along. 

To find The Big O, you need to relax against a lot of instincts telling you not to go any further. This is an act of overwhelming surrender to pleasure, to the unknown, and to your loving partner.

Some of this involves upgrading your body-image, loving your sexuality and your body no matter what shape you’re in. Loving it just because your body is miraculous, amazing, capable of such pleasures and pains, and the only body you will have in this life. Some of it involves releasing shame – even shame that you have hidden away in our blind spots and opening up to self love.


Most of all, discovering The Big O involves trust.

Trusting yourself to be okay, no matter what.

Trusting your partner to hold the space and be safe for you.

Trusting that he can become that man even if he is not yet (because sometimes all that he needs is your trust in him to grow into that man).

Trusting that the decision you made in surrendering to this partner is going to be okay no matter what, because it is part of your path of growing and learning, and becoming more comfortable with surrender into "intimacy" itself.

And this is what I’d like to leave you with, the thing that I know, and the thing that will unlock deeper pleasure in every sexual encounter you have:

Is that You can trust yourself!

And practically speaking, that completes this conversation.
And remember....always leave a man or a woman all the better for knowing you. Average men and women know only the rules. Masculine Men and Feminine Women know and are the EXCEPTIONS!

For Love, Passion and Intimacy.......

Catch you later

Ange Fonce

What are Your thoughts and ideas?

    "Use the Comments box below to tell me what you think (even if you disagree with me).  I really appreciate it when people reply with thoughtful comments. Honestly, it makes my day. Either way I will be glad to hear from you." ~ AF


How To Blow Her Mind In Bed! And The POWERFUL "Welcome Method"

Powerful Massage Method For Mega Orgasms For Women ("The Welcoming "G" SPOT " A Variation On The Welcome Method)

10 Great Tips For Mutual Masturbation, Sex And Intimacy

Erotic, Sexy, Sweet And Spicy or are you just a plain vanilla lover?

Sexual Intimacy. The Sensual Art of Touching And Caressing Skin on Skin!

"INTIMATE COMMUNION" Articles For Your Pleasure!

BY THE WAY, if you ever want to reproduce one of these articles in a blog, in an email, in a book, on a milk carton..GO AHEAD!  You have got my blessing. Just promise me, you will make sure you include a link back to my website and give credit where credit is due. Also please feel free to forward this article to a friend or let them know they can receive their own articles by subscribing to "Intimate Communion" . I am sure they will appreciate your consideration of them.

“The greatest compliment you can give me is when you share this with others. I sincerely appreciate it.”