Are You Courting Flipflop Man Who Blows Hot And Cold

Are you tired of the man you are with blowing hot and cold, snapping back and forth like a rubber band with his affection and commitment?

Dealing with a "Flipflop Man" is one of the trickiest situation for a woman to manage. 

You are upset and confused, and the way you express your feelings and needs often ends up pushing a man further away, often causing the band to "snap" so you lose him forever.

Are you suffering courting a guy who I call "Mr Flipflop Man?"

One day he is coming on strong, pursuing you, and then he practically ignores you.

One day he is affectionate and warm, and the next he seems completely cold and withdrawn from you.

One day he calls you five times in a row, and the next day – nothing.

The truth is that all men "Flipflop" some of the time.

He will get excited about something and be "all over you," and then some days he will feel more in his own head, worried about something that has nothing to do with you, or just needs to be away from intense intimacy with you until he gets his "bearings" again.

Men can be just like women in the way they sometimes need time to "regroup" and really get back in balance. 

Men can get thrown off just as easily as you can - it just looks a little different.

And the way you need to handle a situation where a man is just "regrouping" IS DIFFERENT from the one where a man is bouncing around doing one thing, saying another, and constantly changing the way he relates to you so that you never know where you stand with him.

This is a serious situation where you need to know what to say to him. 

You need to know how to stand up for yourself, and you need to get the answers you want. 

Yet when you try, you end up driving him further away. 

And you are left feeling frustrated and thinking...

"What is it with this guy?" 

So what do you do?

You need a different way to get through to him. 

You need to build an "Emotional Connection" with him by "translating" what you share into a way that will allow him to "connect" with you.

It is a simple yet powerful communication method for speaking your feelings in a way that a man can truly hear, that will melt his defenses, and that will inspire him to come toward you and want to please you.

And because this is such an important tool that has the power to quickly and dramatically transform how you relate to men. 

It is a very powerful method for you to understand and have in your "communication" toolbox.

I call them "Feeling Messages." 

Feeling Messages are a way to "translate" what you are feeling into a simple message a man will positively respond to. 

They are simple to do and have the power to bring you the connection you desire to share with a man.

To show you what I mean, let us walk through an exercise that will help you address the common "Flipflop Man" scenario and how scripting works to turn him around.

The next time you are feeling like you are walking on egg shells with him and you do not know what to say to a man about what is bothering you.

Try this...
 
1. Catch Yourself

This is the crucial first step in communicating with a man in a powerful way. 

You simply want to stop and become aware of what you are thinking and feeling.

2. Track Your Thought

Let us say a man calls you to check in with you about meeting up at the last second - and after not calling you over the last two days the way he said he would.

You do not know whether to tell him you are busy and you cannot make the meetup because you are so mad he did not call - or to just swallow your upset and be cheerful and go out with him.

To track your thoughts, you can practice by carrying a small journal around with you and writing your thoughts down as you notice them.

Put a line down the center of each page from top to bottom, and write your thoughts down on the left side of the pages (you will see how this works in later steps).

Write down ALL your thoughts - your angry ones and also the ones where you are afraid will rock the boat. 

Now...

3. Do A Body Assessment

What I want you to do here is to "check in" with where you are holding tension in your body.

Check in with your belly, your shoulders, your pelvis, your legs - all of you.

The moment you notice tension somewhere, just allow that little part of your body to release the tension.

A great way to do this is to put your hand right on that place - on your shoulder or on your heart or your belly and just by keeping your hand on that part of your body, you allow it to relax.

It is challenging to "relax" your entire body at once, you will quickly get how EASY it is when you do it in little "bits" around your body.

Now notice where the tension moves to from there - it might move from your belly to your shoulder or from your shoulder to your thigh - and just follow it around for a bit.

Breathe into your belly - let go of your belly instead of "tucking it in" and let the air out easily while you are doing the "Body Assessment."

Deep breathing is one of the best and quickest ways of de-stressing yourself.
 
4. Translate Your Thoughts

Now go back to the thoughts you wrote down.

You have already written them down on the left side of the paper. 

NOW - on the right side - "translate" them into feeling messages.

That could look like this...

On the left you may have written,,, "Why didn't you call me, you jerk!"

So you could translate that to... "I felt bad when I missed your call."

Or you may have written... "All you had to do was take two seconds to tell me you were going to be late instead of making me wait!" and change that to "I feel so frustrated when I'm waiting."

Notice how in the translation I never say the word "you?"

And here is why...

Because this is not about HIM!

Even though he may be a "Flipflop Man" - this is still not about him - or even about his behavior.

What it is about...

Is how you feel when you are in his "presence " - and in the presence of his behavior.

In other words, it is all about YOU! 

And how YOU THINK and FEEL!

And THAT IS what you need to communicate to him.

And you have to do it in the way that does not make him "wrong."

Even if he IS being inconsiderate!

5. Forget About Being Right And Be LOVED

How exactly does forgetting about being right work for you?

I mean, after all, you ARE right!

You are likely RIGHTEOUSLY upset!

And I know that you still feel frustrated about it. 

I mean, he is the one who did that horrible thing! 

Why should he  not know that he is doing such bad things?!

And the important question has nothing to do with him. 

The important question is... do you want to be right, and make sure he knows you are right, and make sure he knows what he did wrong...or do you want to be loved?

Now there is the question...

Do YOU want to be RIGHT or do you want to be LOVED?

Because, if you can put all that "righteousness" aside, you can change your love life overnight.

What will happen is this... 

The moment you stop making him wrong, berating him, complaining, or telling him what he should have done or should do.

He will start to relax in your company.

He will relax in a way he has never allowed himself to relax with any other woman before.

He will suddenly stop being defensive.

And you all know what a man does when he feels defensive - he pulls away. 

He does not try harder to make you happy - no - he will just withdraw.

He will stop FEELING affectionate.

He will stop wanting to do anything for you.

He will just use all of his energy to protect himself from what he perceives as a threat from you!

An unhappy, complaining and bitchy woman.

Because it is NOT his responsibility to make you HAPPY!

It is your RESPONSIBILITY to make you HAPPY!

And let me ask you a question here...

"Would you like to spend your time being around an unhappy, complaining and bitchy man?"

I would bet you would not.

The most awful part of this is that you "think" what you are doing is just "letting him know" how bad he makes you feel - only you are doing it in all the wrong and often very negative ways.

So try this "Translation Tool" the next time you have an urge to either keep your feelings to yourself or to attack him.
 
A "Flipflop Man" can be a no-win situation.

OR...

He can be completely TURNED AROUND - by you!

A man can turn around on a dime. 

He will simply forget that bad patch you had yesterday.

If you express yourself to him in this new way of communication today.

Where he might have been cold and shut down yesterday, he may all of a sudden open up, be warm and loving - and STAY that way!

You can do this!

That is the beauty of using a feeling message in a positive way. 

You have the power to change how a man feels and acts with you...just by changing the way you communicate with him.

You can safely express your needs and concerns.

And they can become magnets that connect his heart to yours.

All because of the way you say them!

When women have worked with me, they have been amazed by how easy to learn and use this powerful this tool is, and I want you to have the same benefit.

I want you to know what to say to a man in every situation imaginable - no matter how impossible they seem now - and I want you to feel great about your power as a feminine woman and the response you can get from your man.

Whether you are single or in a relationship, I have got you covered. 

So no matter what you need to say, and what your man is or is not doing, I can help.

What you probably do not realize is that all men are romantic. 

What they often lack is guidance, coaching and proper feedback. 

Once you have the skills, it is so simple to get a man to show his romantic nature

However, a woman can easily suck the romantic life out of any man without even knowing what is going on. 

I see it happen ALL THE TIME. 

If your man is not as romantic as you want him to be, there is most likely something that you are doing (or not doing) that can be changed.

A woman can VERY EASILY bring out the inner romantic in her man with the right techniques and understanding of men

Do you sometimes feel like you are beating your head against a wall trying to get even the ATTENTION you deserve with your man - much less the COMMITMENT you truly want?

And that no matter what you do or say, it somehow ends up pushing him away even more?

I know what that frustration and pain is like - I have seen it happen so many times with single women and the couples I Coach or when my female friends share with me about their relationships, one after the other, time and time again!

It was like an endless pattern of intense chemistry at the beginning, and then he would always sort of "drift away" and she would be heartbroken.

I know that it does not have to be that way for you.

You can shift these kind of situations around completely - so YOU feel powerful, and his love starts flowing TO you, instead of AWAY from you.

I want to share with you this amazing letter from Cindy, who is getting results working with me Coaching her.

I will let her lead you through her steps...

"Dear Ange,

I wanted to write you a letter about the amazing things that have been happening in my life because of working with you and practicing the steps in your system.

Before working with you I have been 'struggling' with a difficult (possibly toxic) 'commitment phobic' man. I have been going to therapy for 5 years and although it has been helpful in working out my self destructive patterns, it has not helped me deal with my "difficult" relationship. Than I found you online and contacted you.

Ever since we have worked together I followed everything you advised...

1. I got busy doing activities that I am passionate about (i.e. yoga classes) and making new friends

2. I put down the oars in my relationship and leaned back

3. I use only feeling messages to communicate with my relationship man (it took some practice, but it is getting easier)

4. Started dating other men casually and let my relationship man know ("my goal is to be in a relationship that is moving towards marriage, so I am not looking to be anyone's girlfriend... we can still see each other)

5. Stopped driving to him... he has to come to me

6. Finally, I stopped going to the last minute "meet me in my office, I got an hour" dates! I told him that he would have to schedule a date with me at least 48 hours in advance.

The most amazing thing has happened... when I first started this process I was totally focused on him... he was everything to me... he was the prize for me to win!!

Well, 6 weeks later, I am focused on me and my life... I noticed yesterday that I am hardly thinking about him anymore and I am starting to not want him anymore...He has gone from calling me 1-2 times per week to calling me 1-2 times per day. Plus he sends my text messages everyday. He finally stopped asking me to "stop by his office" and started planning nice romantic evenings that he sets up several days ahead. The biggest change is his emotional response to me... he loves the feeling messages... I can feel him moving closer to me, where before he was always moving away! By the way, I am continuing to date new guys and am meeting some nice men...

Thank you so much for teaching me how to have the love I want in my life...You are a miracle worker! I have recommended you to my friends. And truly I feel I have my life back and can be myself.

P.S. When I recently told my therapist about all the positive changes in my life, she was so impressed, she asked me about you and I gave her your website address."

Sincerely, Cindy...USA

If Cindy can do this - this amazing turnaround in both how she feels about herself and how her man is treating her - with my Coaching to guide her, I know YOU can, too.

If you would like to get the same help from me, and be walked through the same powerful Tools that Cindy is using to get her great results. 


I will Coach you step-by-step to help you get that sense of being a "prize" for a man, instead of making the man YOUR prize (and therefore making him want to see you and be around you LESS).

I will go into great detail about how "socially courting" other men actually IMPROVES your chances for getting the serious, lifelong commitment you want from your man.

If a man is not sure what he wants from you or with you, why should he have ALL of you to himself while he is figuring things out?

I will work with you and guide you what to do while you are letting him work out his own problems,and how to LOVE YOURSELF so that he feels compelled to be with you.

And you will learn the 7 critical steps to building a life-long committed relationship with a man.

Do what Cindy is doing - no matter where you are in your relationship (if you are married, and the "zing" has gone out of your relationships, I will share with you ways you can not only reignite that "zing." You can make your relationship more passionate and build a deeper intimacy with your man.)

I care about you, I want to be there for you, and I always look forward to hearing your stories - both your successes and challenges.

As always leave a man or woman all the better for knowing you. 

Average men and women know only the rules. 

Masculine Men and Feminine Women know and are the EXCEPTIONS!

They are Passionate DYNAMIC Lovers!

For Love and Intimacy...

Ange Fonce


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