Do you know "How" to get that Exclusive Relationship you want with a Man? 

If a man hasn't talked about being "exclusive" with you yet... then he is likely still casually dating.

See, the truth is that most men enjoy "dating" and won't rush into exclusivity or a long-term commitment. That is unless you know how to TALK to a man about becoming exclusive, and you know how to make a smooth transition into a committed relationship without scaring him away.
  
Unfortunately, this is where a lot of women don't get how things work with men.

Have you ever had "the talk" with a man, tried to "define the relationship", or asked him where things are going?

Dropped "Hints" constantly.

And I have to "Smile" when I write that sentence. because I am so aware when women are fishing and testing the waters on this subject with Me.

If you're like many women, you've probably found that doing this rarely speeds up a guy's desire for exclusivity and commitment. In fact, it might have had the OPPOSITE effect.

Chances are he didn't say, "Wow, you know, you're right! We're so awesome together. We should make things exclusive right this second."

Now, I get that men make relationships feel impossible sometimes. And I know it's not funny when you're seeing a guy for a while and you still have no clue what he's thinking and where he sees things headed for the two of you.

The reality is that, while you can't FORCE a man into commitment... you can LEAD him into it.

Just as a Man can lead a woman into a relationship.

You might not realize this, but you have the power to make a man want to be with you for an exclusive, committed relationship - you just need to know the specific WORDS and ACTIONS that will get him there.

Women write to me constantly about how frustrated they are that the man they're seeing hasn't given them a solid indication of where things are going with the relationship... or even if they're in an exclusive relationship to begin with.

These same women will often keep seeing a guy, having a physical relationship with him, and becoming more invested in him even though they feel extremely uneasy about not knowing where the relationship is headed.

I'm going to show you how NOT to get yourself into this situation in the first place. I'm going to show you how to set things up right from the start so that you FEEL GREAT, and so does the man you're dating.

THE IMPORTANCE OF LETTING HIM KNOW WHERE YOU STAND

Talking about becoming "exclusive" and moving into a relationship where it's spoken that he's not dating other women is an important FOUNDATION.

Without this foundation, I'm sure you've felt that knot in your stomach and that nagging uncertainty that gets in the way of you ever feeling comfortable enough to really open yourself up. You can't really relax and truly love until you know this foundation is in place for you.

The thing is, most men don't understand this about women and about relationships.

They don't get that a woman simply can't truly relax and open herself up to love until she knows she can TRUST the man she is with and that he is loving and LOYAL.

Why?

Because men don't always understand the value of this "foundation" and feel it the way most women do...If a man isn't the one ASKING YOU for an exclusive and committed relationship, that means YOU have to be the one to initiate the conversation.

And to be sincere, most men and women are lousy at this.

Setting this foundation for a "relationship" they just "fall" into it and assume this is what each other wants.

So now to the how?

GETTING THE EXCLUSIVITY YOU WANT WITH A MAN

You never want to be in a situation where you are asking a man where you stand with him. Not only does this put you in a vulnerable position...but it assumes that he's the one in control, and it will actually make him feel LESS attracted to you.

Doing this is actually one of the big turn off's for men, and it's a surprisingly common "dating strategy" women take on that I call becoming the CONVINCER.

Men are simply NOT ATTRACTED to women who try and convince them to be in a more serious relationship with them... or to women who feel that they would need to try and convince a man in the first place.

Instead, men are deeply and naturally attracted to women who live their lives and have certain "standards" when it comes to interacting with men. And one of the unspoken standards that is most attractive to a man is a woman who is what I call SELECTIVE.

HOW BEING SELECTIVE MAKES HIM WANT ONLY YOU

When a man has an easy time having a woman fall for him, or a man sees a woman acting in a way that says she will not be okay without his love and commitment, then a man is TURNED OFF and shuts down on a emotional level.

This is a man's basic emotional response when he senses a woman "needs" to move forward too fast too soon. He senses that the reason she wants to move forward is more about satisfying UNMET emotional needs than about true connection and appreciation... and it triggers him to pull away.

When this happens, a man sees you as desperate for more, and potentially emotionally unstable rather than seeing you as a woman who is stable and grounded emotionally, no matter how things go in that moment.

The truth is that a man wants the woman he chooses to get closer to and open up to have a level of control over her life and her emotional state.

So when he senses this "need" for a relationship, it sets off red flags for him.

An Alpha Masculine Man is certainly Aware of this!

On the other hand, when a woman is SELECTIVE about how and when she moves into a more serious and committed relationship, she's not coming from a place of "unmet emotional needs."

Instead, she's coming from a place of INVITING the man to be with her, but at the same time being clear that her life is going to continue forward and be full and rich NO MATTER what a man does.

This "attitude" is a subtle shift, but the RESPONSE that a man will have to it will make all the difference.

When a man feels that a woman is coming from this place where she doesn't "need" the relationship but that it could be something she knows would make life even better, a man has an entirely different experience.

When a man senses that the woman he's with is also carefully deciding whether or not she should CHOOSE HIM or not, suddenly a man will jump into the "space" that brings a more committed relationship together.

So aside from having the right "attitude", how do you show a man that you're selective and trigger this response that will draw him CLOSER to you?

You can do it by saying something as simple as: "It's completely your right to date more than one woman at a time, but I want you to know that in order for me to become physically involved with a man, I need to be in an exclusive relationship with him."

Notice that you're not making any demands.

You're not displaying any of the neediness that men find unattractive and will take advantage off. And you're letting him know that you have standards that HE needs to meet before you decide to choose to be with him.

MAKING HIM THINK IT'S ALL HIS IDEA

Here's something I want you to understand...

When you present your needs and boundaries like the way I showed you above, the right man will realize he'd be a fool to lose you. The right man will step up to the plate and ASK YOU for the commitment you're after... and he'll swell up thinking it was his idea all along and that he's "won" you.

And, on the other hand...

When you're with the wrong man and you communicate your needs and your selectivity, he will pull away and show you what you needed to see in the first place: that he wasn't the right guy to begin with, or that it just isn't the right time for the two of you.

In other words...

How you handle the exclusivity question will show you a great deal about the kind of man you're with... and will keep you from wasting time with the wrong one.

How you handle exclusivity can make all the difference between whether the right guy is inspired to devote himself to you... or whether he'll withdraw and start to lose interest.

So you know... Exclusivity is just one of the TESTS that come up in relationships with men. 

Do you want to know more about how you can set up these "tests" where you can find out just how a man is "thinking" about becoming "exclusive" with you, in a way that will not scare him off?


And as ever...Always leave a man or a woman all the better for knowing you. Average men and women know only the rules. Masculine Men and Feminine Women know and are the EXCEPTIONS!

For Love and Intimacy...

Ange Fonce

What are Your thoughts and ideas?

 "Use the Comments box below and "Have Your Say" (even if you disagree with me).  I really appreciate it when people reply with thoughtful comments. Honestly, it makes my day. Either way I will be glad to hear from you."

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