Advanced 3 Step Dynamic Dating Method Of How to Attract And Engage Women In Conversation With Confidence

In almost every single one-on-one coaching (and the many e mails I receive one concern that stands out for men is when they get into a one-on-one situation with a woman.

It is usually this... 

"How do I do this stuff when I'm in-person with a woman? Face to face?"

This is what I call the "Real World" problem. 

You can learn a ton of great information off-line, on-line, from books and my articles but when you are in the "Real- World," it is tough to be "on" and creative, for most men isn't it?

I don't know if you have ever had this problem, but when I was first learning these skills to be confident and relaxed around women, I would do a massive amount of preparation, memorizing a bunch of phrases and stuff.

I would finally get past my approach anxiety "the nerves" and start talking with a woman.

"Hey, my name is Ange..."

And after I got the conversation started (especially with a "hot woman")...BLAHHHHHHH...I wouldd get nervous when I could not remember any of the stuff I had memorized.

"Do I say that thing about this or that or more more"? Or do I tease her? What was that great teasing line I thought of the other day...? Uhm... Ahhhggg... Errr....Damn!"

I mean, I thought I knew it cold when I left the house, but between then and now I totally lost it.

And I would stand there like a deer in the headlights, no idea what to say to her. (Insert uncomfortable pause here and my confidence seeping out of my feet like a wet puddle into the ground.)

You thought you were all prepared after reading all my cool advice and tips, but now you are sitting in that uncomfortable silence while she stares at you, waiting for SOMETHING to come out of your mouth. (I have learnt now that silence can be a very powerful tool when used in the right way and the right moment with eye contact to rise the tension and then break it.)

Finally she says, "Oh, my friends are over there, see you later..."

And then, as she is walking away, and you are kicking yourself.

You suddenly come up with the PERFECT thing you should have said.

Too late! (If only the REAL world worked as we want it to be in our heads.)

Ever had that happen to you?

Well, let us deal with this problem.

ENTER THE "SITUATIONAL REHEARSAL..."

Here is a technique I used to use to make sure I was really prepared to USE all the cool stuff I had memorized. (And not just with women either, for when I am leading workshops and speaking.)

CAUTION: I am not advising you to learn and rehearse someone else's words! 

Come up with things of your own that are TRUE to talk with women about and other people about. 

No fake stories (Unless your playing around and setting up for a joke) and most of all no lying. 

You do not need to make stuff up or use someone else's words to be interesting to women or anyone for that matter!

You see, I found out that just sitting at home on my couch reading this stuff on my computer was not enough when I started out really getting to know about women. 

Studying, researching, understanding is great.

And there is no substitute for getting out there and gaining the experience of PRACTICE!

I had to go out and practice lots in the REAL World.

And even that was not enough, so I tried something a little different and off the wall.

And it worked well!

Here is my technique for being prepared and NOT losing it in front of a woman.
 
I am assuming that you have walked up and said "Hi" or some other opener to get the conversation started with her. 

I have shared with you plenty of methods in these articles, and you can learn many more in my Dynamic Life Development Relationship Systems. 

And, as you know, it is not what you open with that is important, but what you say NEXT that will make the difference.

And how do you keep it going with all the stuff you want to talk about?

Here is what you do first...

STEP 1: CREATE YOUR OWN BRIDGE

A conversational bridge is a way of bringing up a topic that you want to steer the conversation towards. 

And if you are not aware, I post lots of these tips on my Facebook Page and on my Google+1 page about conversation starters and how to break the ice in any social situation.

Let us say you know you want to talk about your passions and interests with a woman, and you have thought of a great way to bring it up and talk about it. 

And, let us say your passion is photography.

You have a couple ways you could bring it up in conversation...

"You know, I was just thinking as I'm looking at you that you would make a fantastic subject for photography. Have you ever thought about doing a sitting?" (Note that I did NOT use any corny lines about "you should be a model.")

You could also bring it up without focusing on her by saying...

"I was out scouting locations for some photos today. The light here is really fantastic for bringing out skin tones and eye color. Isn't it great?" (I don't have time to cover it here, but showing this kind of "vision" of the world is VERY attractive to women.)

Okay, so now we have got a couple ways to bring up your interests in conversation, without bragging AND at the same time communicating to a woman that you have got a hobby in your life that brings out your passion.

Maybe you have some great questions to ask, and things to say that you think of when you are at home, but now you need to have it ready all the time.

You want to be able to come up with this when you are out and about, but you find yourself constantly forgetting it when the pressure is on.

Here is your next step...

STEP 2: ENGAGE YOUR MODALITIES

Modalities are simply your senses. 

Sight, smell, hearing, taste,touch and intuition.

The more of your senses you use, the quicker things are embedded in your mind.

So you want to spend some time before you go out writing these words down, whether it is the questions you want to ask, or just a list of topics you want to bring up in conversation.

This will engage your "kinesthetic" senses.

Then you want to spend some time saying the words out loud. 

This will help you rehearse and say things smoothly, and it also engages your "auditory" hearing.

And you also want to spend some time reviewing things on paper. 

Read and re-read the phrases and information you want to commit to memory. 

This will engage your "visual" senses.

But even this is not enough for most of us. 

You need ONE extra simple step to make this work, and it is something that not many men know about.

I have a special method that increases your results about 100%.

You need to...

STEP 3: ENGAGE "SITUATIONAL REHEARSAL" TECHNIQUE

Back when I was in University, I used to have a good method of learning material I needed for tests. 

You probably did, too. (And I still use this method to this day when researching and developing goals and projects.)

I would cram all my notes on a piece of paper with facts, writing stuff everywhere, and in every direction. 

On the margins, sideways, whatever.

Then, when it came time to study for a test on dates and names and memorized facts, I would just sit down with the page and cover up sections with my hand and try to recall the information.

Well, we all did this in some way or another with our notes. 

What you do not realize is that you were not learning the information as much as you were learning WHERE that information was on the paper.

You got locked into recalling the information based on WHERE it was, not WHAT it is.

So when you get a fact or information that you cannot see on a piece of paper, you would forget it fast. (Which why it is so easy to forget names. You are not paying attention to it enough the first time, and there is nothing to anchor it in your mind.)

That's right, it was not the information you were learning as much as giving your brain a LOCATION for that information. 

It is called "spatial relationship," and it is how your mind stores information. 

It is more important to give a RELATIONSHIP to the information to make it stick.

Like right now, if you close your eyes, chances are you can recall where almost everything is in your bedroom, or another room in your apartment that you are very familiar with.

So here is how you use this "Situational Rehearsal" technique. 

It is based on the way your brain really learns.

And you will get at least 10 times better retention and recall of information if you use it.

In my previous example, you came up with a great way to talk about photography, your passion. 

And you came up with a great way to actually SAY it to a woman. 

You may even have learnt some about "Open Questions" that you want to memorize to use.

And if you do not know anything about "how" to use open questions?

I suggest you best learn fast.

Now you have to practice recalling these things in MANY different locations, and in many different situations.

You would want to do stuff like...

Recall and recite the words when you're in the shower.

Call your home voice mail and recite it back as a message.

This one is great. 

It will put you "on the spot" - AND it will give you a chance to review how you said it later. 

You can do this with your cell phone voice mail, too.

Recall and recite when you are driving in the car.

Recall the words when you are watching a television show, as if you are saying it to the people on the screen.

Recall and recite when you are out on a city street. (Just whisper it so that people do not think you are crazy.)

And if you REALLY want to improve by leaps and bounds in your inner and outer game of conversation, here is a an EXCELLENT bonus technique...

Put a Bluetooth headset on (or any cell phone earpiece so it looks like you are talking on your phone). 

Then, go out and recite what it is you are memorizing when you are out in public on a city street or in a store.

Do not worry, other people will just assume you are talking to someone on your cell phone. 

And this method will help you get over your fear of looking foolish in front of other people. 

AND it gives you a killer rehearsal for saying it in front of a woman. 

You get your shyness out of the way, and you build confidence in the process. (I used to do this all the time, and make up some pretty crazy conversations to see if I could get people around me to listen in. "He hit the cop with a baseball bat??? No WAY!" Try it sometime... it's better than prank phone calling.)

The point of this is that you must get out there and put yourself in as many DIFFERENT situations where you have to recall the information you are trying to memorize.

The more situations you find to rehearse in, the better you will be when it counts - in front of a woman. 

In front of ANYONE!

By using this method, you activate millions more neurons in your brain, which commits the words DEEP into your memory. 

And then this helps you pull out the words when you really need to, and you will not have any of those embarrassing gaps and silences in your conversations with women.

Now if you would like to learn more valuable methods for handling conversation and talking with ANYONE, ANYTIME, ANYWHERE.

I highly encourage you to work with me in my Dynamic Life Development System.

I spent many years researching and practicing all the latest knowledge on conversation and communication between people to give you the most complete understanding of how to create thrilling and intriguing conversations with women, with friends - with ANYONE.

Tony ( A young Man I coached) wrote in to me...

"I wanted to tell you that I really am really enjoyed working with you Ange. I learnt to understand what goes on at so many levels in communicating with women. I appreciate the fact that there are no rehearsed gimmicks or lines that I need to know but rather it affords me the opportunity to create my own game for life in general..."

I will be back again soon with more tips and techniques for you. 

To help you DEVELOP your Confidence and build a GREAT life for yourself.

As always leave a man or woman all the better for knowing you. 

Average men and women know only the rules. 

Masculine Men and Feminine Women know and are the EXCEPTIONS!

For Love, Passion and Intimacy...

Ange Fonce

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