"Seduction!" How To Get Her In The "HOT" Mood For Sex!" 

Do you know why sometimes you can trigger all of a woman's sexual feelings and emotions...and other times all you seem to trigger are her "let's just be friends" defensive systems?

This is a really interesting topic because if you're like most guys, you've probably experienced triggering both types of reactions, at different times... sometimes in the SAME woman.

Single guys are usually painfully aware of this balance between "sex" and "let's just be friends", but this same balance exists in every relationship and in every marriage...

You can come home from a night at a movie, a restaurant, or out with friends, and you're in the mood for a little fun in bed... and sometimes you can feel her connect with your sexual chemistry, and she shivers with pleasure when you touch her...But sometimes the circuit just doesn't connect and she just wants to go to sleep.

It would be easy to say, "well, she was tired, she had a long day."

Sure, that happens. If she really got no sleep last night and there's all sorts of stress in her life - there's plenty of things that can take a woman out of "the mood."

But MOST of the time, you'd be amazed at how much control YOU have over whether or not she's feeling in the mood.

It has to do with what we sometimes call "sexual chemistry," and when you can make her feel that connection, any woman will very happily give up a few hours of sleep, or just about anything else to get you on top of her.

So let's go back to the beginning and ask the question again...

Single guy:

You are talking to a woman and clearly you have some intellectual chemistry - she's laughing at your jokes, she thinks you're interesting, and you feel yourself getting really powerfully physically attracted to her - YOU definitely want to take things to the next level.

But does she?

What is the secret to making her take the jump from, "this is an interesting man," to "I want this guy to fuck my brains out right now!"?

Married guy:

You can have a great evening with your wife, you can be having a great conversation, and if you are in the mood for love-making, there is still a bridge to cross between her feeling that:"my husband is my best friend" feeling, and that "my husband is so sexy I want him to take me RIGHT NOW" feeling.

One of the most important keys to making her feel the second way is to "lead" or be "dominant," and to exhibit emotional maturity.

I'm going to tell you exactly HOW you do that in a way that makes her FEEL powerful sexual chemistry, but first, let me quickly explain the "why."

Humans have evolved across millions of years to very carefully select who they will have children with.

For a man, this decision is not a big deal because, theoretically, a man could easily impregnate 7 women in 7 days. He can afford some  "trial and error" in his choice of a mate.

But for a woman this calculation is very different. She can only get pregnant once every couple of years and each time she does, especially in the natural world, she risks death.

She only has so many opportunities to get it right. So women must be much more sexually selective than men.

Now of course she is not thinking about whether or not you are good genetic stock for mating when she is deciding whether or not she's "in the mood".

She's probably not thinking about babies at all, and very likely assumes that one or both of you will be using birth control.

But there IS something deep in her unconscious that is like a computer program running in the background of her brain that is making decisions that cause her to be either aroused or not aroused based exactly on these calculations.

Here's one more piece to the equation that is very important to why having the ability to push her sexual chemistry buttons will make sex with you such an amazing sexual experience for her...

Women are more likely to get pregnant when they experience powerful orgasms.

There is no evolutionary advantage to a woman experiencing powerful orgasms with a man who has a larger penis or who knows a special way to use his tongue... which is why those things are NOT what make the most incredible sex happen.

Instead women have their most powerful orgasms when they feel sexual chemistry, trust, and intimacy. Because she has all sorts of built in instincts for feeling sexual chemistry for the RIGHT man.

You might hear a woman say something like, "I want a man who knows how to be a MAN."

Leading and emotional maturity are what she is talking about.

Here's HOW you can trigger all of those things with the woman that you are with...

"Leading" is a very interesting concept and it can be applied almost anywhere in your interaction with a woman in subtle and not-so-subtle ways.

Here are 4 areas that YOU should be leading... each one creates the path for the next, and "leads" her into a powerful zone of sexual chemistry:

1) Male - Female Interactions

Everyone knows that guys are supposed to lead when dancing.

And look, I know, most guys aren't very good dancers and so that can sometimes be a challenge.

A woman will certainly forgive you if you are not a great dancer or can't lead. No big deal.

But if you CAN lead, she will FEEL it. It will create sexual tension for her. It's not going to turn her into a horny sex -monster, but she'll feel it.

If you are a great dancer and can lead with powerful authority, she'll feel it more strongly.

Personally, I Myself am a great a dancer, but fortunately the world is filled with other normal opportunities for you to lead.

When you hold the door open for her, you are leading the path to where you are going together.

Likewise, when you take her arm while walking, instead of waiting for her to offer hers...

When you pull out her chair for her to sit - you are helping her and being nice - but also there is a subtle command behind the gesture:

"You sit here."

Leading in conversation is an art. Interrupting and being a jerk is not the way it is done. But being aware that you are gently leading the threads of what you are discussing is much more powerful than you might think.

But remember this:

Part of leading is not having to PROVE that you're leading all the time.

You never need to push her around, be a jerk, or a bully. Leading and being dominant is a subtle thing that rises from male confidence and your ease with masculine identity.

Add a measure of calm emotional maturity throughout your day...

Show her that you are not easily thrown off your emotional horse like a little boy, and you will simultaneously demonstrate a quality of confidence and masculinity that will have her dying to rip her clothing off for your pleasure.

2) Eye Contact

Eye contact can be a powerful way to lead and show dominance.

Becoming aware of this, rather than allowing it to happen randomly can have powerful effects on your relationships with women.

When you look at a woman and your eyes flit around nervously, she does not "notice" this fact... but she DOES "FEEL" it.

Instead, hold your gaze on her eyes.

You will find that she will lock onto your eyes in return.

Now the key is not to look away until she does... and if you DO look away (sometimes women get locked into your gaze so powerfully that they CAN'T look away), then shift your eyes upwards or to the side, never down).

Shifting your eyes downward after eye contact is submissive. She won't "notice" this but she will "FEEL" it.

You will notice as you become aware of this stuff, that when a woman is feeling attracted to you, she will either hold your gaze or glance downwards... usually both.

Don't get into a creepy staring contest with her. Smile, and look to the side if it's getting weird, and then back into her eyes.

Here's an important caution however, let these meetings of the eyes be casual, not constant.

Always staring at her eyes, trying to get her to make eye contact with you, after a while, will feel like you are trying to hard to get her attention... rather than her wanting your attention... and THAT is not leading.

Emotional maturity guarantees that you'll get this right:

It's not a CONTEST. It's not about proving you're the man. If you already KNOW that you're the man and you are free of feelings of competition and insecurity with your lover, then she will feel the masculine, gentle power of your gaze and it will leave her squirming in anticipation.

3) Touch Her

There is a delicate and subtle dance to touching.

As you are moving from conversation to eye contact to touching and ultimately to sex, touch increases slowly and steadily, and from casual to more intimate.

Learning how to pace this escalation takes some time and paying attention to her reaction.

There is a psychological bridge to cross between touching her hand and touching her face or her inner thighs or her breasts...

You don't want to rush across, obviously, but being too timid to cross is worse. When the time is right, increase the intimacy of your touch.

If she is holding your eye contact, then you can touch her face or touch her more sexually and she will probably welcome it.

This shows that you are unafraid to LEAD the interaction towards one that is more sexual.

Make your touch confident, relaxed, and assured.

This creates magic sexual chemistry.

4) Leading Sexually

Well, if you've been following along so far, we've gone from holding doors for her to touching her breasts...

So really, we are in the realm of sex now. And to stop using a confident, leading dominance at this point, would be cheating her out of the prize.

You have gotten her feeling sexual attraction without her necessarily knowing why. What you do with it next will determine whether she talks about the "sexual chemistry" she felt with you tomorrow.

When you are making love to a woman, it is very important to not be tentative or shy.

Of course there are women who like this and think it's "cute." But they will have a much more powerful experience with you if you are confident in your lead.

I guess I'll also have to make exceptions for women who are sexually dominant, but they exist more in fetish videos than reality. It might be a funny game for her to play to be dominant once in a while with her powerful lover... It's playful and fun precisely because you both know that she is doing it with your good natured permission...

But very, very few women prefer to be the ACTUALLY and habitually dominant partner in the bedroom.

So lead.

Touch her with confidence and don't wait for her approval for every little thing you do.

"Do you feel like making love tonight, or should I just get ready for bed?" is going to KILL it for her... and unless she is really exceptionally starved for sex, she's going to reject you.

You should either tell her what you want her to do, or you should move her physically into the bedroom with gentleness, warmth, confidence, passion, lust... anything but tentativeness.

Of course, you want to do the things that feel good for her too... but you don't do that by asking her what to do next... you do it by trying the things that please YOU and PAYING ATTENTION to what is working for her too.

After learning "leading and dominance," the next big step to creating sexual chemistry with a woman is learning how to create "trust and intimacy."

This is a HUGE and incredibly important topic for making her feel like there is a nearly magical sexual connection between the two of you.

This means that on the occasions that she really is just too tired or can't get out of her head because of a high-anxiety day... that you display that emotional maturity born of the confidence in knowing that YOUR ego is not dependent upon HER reactions.

And you simply can't expect her to have these feelings of trust for you if you don't have calm certainty in your interactions with her or if you whine at her like she's your mummy.

Sexual trust is about her trusting you to guide her safely through powerful sexual experiences.

For that she wants a man who acts like a man.

Can you do these things?

Of course you can. And if you need to do some personal growth to get there, then putting in that time to learn these things will have much bigger pay off's than just a great sex life and if you want to know la lot more than Contact Me.

INSTANT TIP: Her Body Language Tells You If She is Attracted

Body language can often be far more useful than what a girl says when it comes to understanding if she is attracted to you or not.

The more a woman is attracted to you, the more she will become more self-conscious and insecure.

Verbally she may not do anything to show this. But body language it a lot more subtle and she is much more likely to show signs of it.

She will fidget, she will break eye-contact, she will orient her body towards you, she will seek your approval, she will seek your attention, and she will be clearly emotionally connected to your accepting or rejecting her.

She will arch her back, put out her chest, suck in the tummy, toss her hair, different parts of the body will get exposed a little more, she will walk rolling the hips, sit in more sexually suggesting ways...

Learn to notice those subtle shifts and they will tell you all you need to know.

And practically speaking, that completes my conversation for this article.

What are Your thoughts and ideas?

 "Use the Comments box below and "Have Your Say" (even if you disagree with me).  I really appreciate it when people reply with thoughtful comments. Honestly, it makes my day. Either way I will be glad to hear from you."

And as ever...Always leave a man or a woman all the better for knowing you. Average men and women know only the rules. Masculine Men and Feminine Women know and are the EXCEPTIONS!

For Love, Truth and Intimacy...

Ange Fonce


FOR MEN: Assertive vs.Tentative Sex with Your Woman

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