"Oral Sex" Blowing His Mind With Your Mouth 

By Ange Fonce

Please Be Aware That This Is An “In Depth” Article
And Contains Content of An  Adult “Intimate Nature!”

There are two parts to this Article... the first part is about why “oral sex” is important and what it “means” to a man... and “how” it reveals who you are as a “lover”... and “how” to drive a man into “pleasure” that goes beyond his “body” and “rocks him” to the “very core of his being”… through the simple act of a “blowjob.”

In the second part I consolidated the responses of  many men who anonymously described the best “blowjob” they had ever received in their life and what “particular techniques” drove them “wild” with “pleasure.”

Now... do I have your attention?

Good... let us get started…

Sex Is Only Interesting When It Releases Passion... 

The Basics...

I am sure I do not need to tell you that “hygiene” is “particularly important” when it comes to “oral sex”... and let me be specific… it is totally okay for you to insist on having "his cock" in exactly the condition that you like it best... that usually means recently well cleaned with at least soap and water... and not looking and smelling like a cheese factory... even if you are a cheese “lover”... I am sure you will not be to impressed with that particular brand of cheese!

As I will explain further in a moment... his “enjoyment” of the “experience” is “fundamentally connected” to YOUR ENJOYMENT... so this is a "good place" to start... and you might also consider it a fair requesting that he shave.

I know some men have objections to this as they may consider it effeminate... and if YOU have objections to it because you prefer a man to have manly body hair... then by all means... skip this one... and if you and he are willing to do a little “experimenting”... assuming he is not already shaving down there...  I do recommend trying this out... it does keep the area cleaner and fresher... and here is how you sell him on the idea... it makes the “sensations” of  “lips” and “tongue” on “skin” much more “pleasurable!”

If your man has “concerns” about the seemingly impossible task of shaving the wrinkled skin of his scrotum... you can give him this good news... for reasons yet not understood by modern science... you can run a regular wet razor over the scrotum and it will not nick or cut... yes  it is scary… and all he has to fear is “fear” itself... and the “sensation” afterwards will be well worth overcoming his terror... if he asks how “you know” all of this... you will have to use your “best judgement” between “radical honesty” and...

“Jenny told me that her boyfriend shaves and he told her and she told me...”

It is also worth mentioning here that if you like your man to return the favour... it is critical that you treat your own “pleasure garden” like the most “sacred” and “beautiful of alters” that you are preparing for the “god of love”... because your “hygiene... care...grooming” and the “pleasure” you take in keeping your “vulva” and “vagina” beautiful will make a BIG difference in his enthusiasm... as you would not like visiting a “cheesery”... he would not appreciate visiting a “smelly fish factory!”

The “mental” and “emotional” aspect alone of the “devotion” and “love” that you bring to your own “body” and “sexuality” will “powerfully” affect him.  

The second basic thing you need to “know” is that “teeth” can be a “problem”... and while the “feeling” of your teeth “touching lightly” might be something he enjoys… make sure that you “understand” the “difference” between “intentional gentle biting” and accidental painful scraping... or “chewing” the bone... “enthusiasm" is highly “appreciated”... and so is “loving care!”

Finally... it is worth ”noting” that it IS possible to get or give a “sexually transmitted disease” through “oral sex”... unlubricated condoms are a possibility here... as well as mouth dam... and as with any "sex"... choose your partner wisely and make “mature decisions” with whatever you decide to do... with those few basics out of the way... let us get into it... and read on...

What One Desires Is Unrestrained Passion... Fire For Fire...

The Advanced...

By far... the number 1 thing that men “appreciate” when it comes to "oral sex" is YOUR ENJOYMENT of it.

Men talk about this in different ways... “enthusiasm... she is INTO it... she gets lost in it”… and they all mean the same thing... that you are “enjoying yourself... enjoying him”... and it is an “important” thing for you to “understand” on a deep and “intimate level.”

Let me be “completely clear”... you can do the “twirly tongue on the tip” while playing with "his balls" and then “deep throat him” like a porn star... and if you are just doing it to “please him” because you “feel” like that is “how” you will keep your man “happy”... it will not come close to the “satisfaction” that he would get if you just did whatever “felt good to you”... and “loved” doing to him and YOU enjoyed the “pleasure” that you could TAKE from having him in your mouth.

This is a tough one to hear if you are one of those women who is just a thoughtful and diligent partner reading this for pointers... and you do not “really enjoy” going down on your man and you never have... I  “know” that you are “capable” of “enjoying it”... and “learning” to “enjoy it”... is often a matter of giving yourself “permission” to “enjoy it.”

I have heard countless stories of women who never had “oral sex” with their husband or boyfriend... or hated it when they did… who went on to LOVE it with their next boyfriend after the breakup.


I think it has a lot to do with “feelings of obligation”... nobody wants to feel like they have to do anything... and then there is the all too frequent “power struggle” within the relationship... that makes a woman stop seeing her man as a “sexual being” and start seeing him as a sometimes “frustrating partner” in the daily tasks of life.

It can be hard to imagine under those circumstances how you can “feel” the “powerful turn on” that comes from having the symbol of “his masculinity” in your mouth... and getting back in touch with his “masculinity”... which of course means getting back in touch with your “feminine sexuality” is the "critical factor."

And it is the same for women who would like their husband would head down town more frequently... giving him better “blowjobs” will not make him feel obliged to return the favour.

So what will?

Not making him “wrong” throughout the day not “emasculating” him with “words” or “deeds” and most of all... maintaining a “boundary” of “feminine” and “masculine polarity” between you is usually what it takes to make him eager to get up close and personal with your "womanly parts."

Obviously there may be deeper issues... yet this is the best place I know of to start... so let us return to THE most “critical of factors” to pleasing a man “orally.” 

YOUR Enjoyment.... I have spoken elsewhere about the “idea” that when someone “tries too hard to please you”... it is a "big turn off"... it is hard enough for men to be “good receivers”... yes even of “blowjobs”… if we "feel" like it is “completely one sided” and you are doing it just to “please us”... it is just not as “enjoyable”... and far worse... if it is one of those big ACTS of “oral sex skill”... a big show of “expertise” that is “secretly hiding deep insecurity” and “fear of rejection”... that can be so difficult for a man to receive that he may have difficulty even maintaining his erection.

We have all met those women... sometimes in bars... who “brag” about their skill in “oral pleasure” and play out a persona of “sexual sophistication” while saying shocking things... do they get male attention?

To be honest... yes they do... yet at the end of the day... while a man might accept or even enjoy an easy “blowjob”... the “deep insecurity” of a woman like that and her need for “attention”... is something that will make him “feel uncomfortable”... for most men there is just no way that it will be the “great experience” that she was bragging about... although he may tell her it was just to get out of there.

There is no substitute for “genuine enthusiasm”... and "the energy of intimacy"... if you "love feeling" him in your mouth... if you truly enjoy the smoothness and the hardness of his penis when he is excited... if you love the way he gasps and moans... if you get powerfully turned on by making him lose control… then you already know everything you need to know to rock his world.

The rest is just a couple of details and a bit of playful experimentation and you can be confident that you are giving your man "powerfully unforgettable experiences"... do you want to make sure?

Then just add this... "communicate" to him... with words... with touch... with sounds... and with your body EXACTLY HOW MUCH pleasure you get from going down on him.

O Fountain Mouth... Giver...
You Mouth Which Speaks Inexhaustibly Of That One Pure Thing... 

The Master Class...

What is so great about "oral sex" anyway?

Why do men make such a "big deal" out of it?

Does it really "feel" so much better?

The answer to the last question is “no.”

In studies where men were blindfolded... not only could they not tell the difference between “oral sex” and a hand with some lubrication on it... the men in the study overwhelmingly preferred the “hand job”... and yet if you offer this study to a man and then give him the choice between a good “hand job” with plenty of lube or “taking him in your mouth”... there is hardly a man on the planet that will go with the “hand job”... this “fact is important” if you want to “understand your man.”

Because it reveals the reason why no “magic technique” on Earth can possibly make you great at “oral sex”... there is nothing you can do with your mouth that will feel better than your hand... that is "why" you “need to understand”... that “blowjobs” are not about “stimulating his cock”... they are about a “larger” and more “important sex organ”... his BRAIN... and specifically... his EMOTIONS!

It is commonly held by many women that “oral sex” is “disconnected” and less “intimate” than “intercourse”... not so for a man... “oral sex” is an “act of very deep intimacy” because it represents an “extraordinary level of acceptance” of his “deepest insecurities” and childhood wounds... because as far back as he can remember... he was made wrong about “sexual desires”... and made to feel “ashamed of his cock.”

You cannot stare at the girls... you cannot touch the girls there... you definitely cannot touch your self there... and you have to keep that thing hidden at all times... etc... etc... etc.!

So many men “feel” they have to hide their cock in shame and that includes their “spiritual cock”... and if it gets hard at the wrong time... nothing could be more embarrassing... and while women certainly have “hangups” about their “breasts”... the fact is... the breast cannot hide... we all know if you have got big ones or small ones and eventually you have to get used to it... yet a man will keep his cock hidden away... possibly until he loses his “virginity” or gets his first “blowjob."

It is an ”interesting little fact” to note that the vast majority of men who have an “average sized penis” will self report that it is too small... the thing that women do not “understand”… the thing that men cannot admit… is that the “blowjob” is so ”important” to us... it is so “powerfully erotic” to us... not because of the way it “feels”... because of the way it "makes us feel”... when a woman gets on her knees before us and accepts our cock in her mouth... we “feel validated”... we feel “accepted”... we “feel the shame of our entire lives vanished” in that “selfless act” of you "giving something of your femininity”... be it your dignity... your good girl image... even if it is your deep revulsion for our maleness… for the sake of accepting the “deep... infinite lust” that we carried with us alone into adulthood.

And when you “understand that power”... when you “understand how your ability” to actually take “pleasure” from that act of “giving” that frees us from the pain of our inner child…then you will “understand why”... when you take us in your mouth... when you show us and maybe even TELL us that you "love our cock"... you are performing an act not of “sex”... you are "giving" of yourself... “selfless love.”

Alive To A passion For The Earth... 
How Love Burns Through The Putting In The Seed... 

The Top  Techniques For Blowing His Mind With Your Mouth...

Over the years of my work I have asked men the following questions... 

"What was the best oral sex experience of your life… and what it made it so incredible?"  

"What one blowjob technique really drives you wild?"

Here is what men have shared with me... and while no great expertise has been required on my part... and while some of the answers the men offered were often predictable... it has also been  truly “enlightening” to see just “how much emphasis” they placed on “passion” and “enthusiasm” and also “creativity” is also “appreciated” and it is worth remembering that you have got “2 hands” as well as “tongue” and “lips.”

A great “blowjob” is like a “dance” where you “lose yourself” in the “music” and the “interplay” between you and your partner is constantly shifting and “evolving”... your ability to surprise both your partner and yourself during the dance is a big piece of the “pleasure” that is possible.

Here are the 7 things that the majority of them agreed are the main features of a GREAT blowjob…

Enthusiasm And Attitude...

It was no surprise to me how much the men agreed and emphasized the number one spot on this list... what this should tell you is... however “inexperienced” you may be... it does not matter... your skills are a distant second to your relishing the process... “your enjoyment of him.”

One man insisted...

“NO technique ever can compare to her attitude... no way... that is much more important... no doubt Ange let women know this.”

What I love about this response... and there are many like this... is that it “echoes the advice” that I have been giving to men about “how” to please you as a woman... stay “present” and “focus on your own pleasure”... if you stay truly in the “here and now” when you are “pleasuring your man”... he is going to FEEL that... and he is going to LOVE IT.

Another man told me that he most enjoyed it when he knew his partner...

“Her surrendered to the process and pretty much “worshipped” my cock... so to speak... it turned me on sexually far more than the technique... her energy was my buzz!”

According to these men... if you are just “going through the motions”... he is going to know it... and that is only going to lead to a forgettable experience at best... if you can “demonstrate through your performance” that you “enjoy pleasuring him” and bringing him to “climax” as much as he is “enjoying receiving it”... he will be “truly moved” and profoundly satisfied... and better yet he will very likely be more than happy to return the favour... to you!

There are many “different ways” that you can show “your pleasure” and “share” and “express your passion”... your overall “intensity” and devotion are "ultimately what mean the most"… and as far as specific techniques... “moans of pleasure” was frequently sited as a big turn on... on to the next one...

Looking Into His Eyes...

I was not surprised to see this as being many mens favourite… it is really satisfying to me to “know” that “eye contact” during “oral sex” is so key for so many men... locking eyes... even when you sit across from each other in a restaurant... can be “foreplay” in itself... can you imagine how much power that “eye contact” can have when you are giving him head?

One man said that his favourite gesture is...

“Just the look in her eyes as she looks up with my cock in her mouth... sends me to heaven... the eyes say a thousand words.”

Why leave a “pay off” as big as that out of the equation?

It is worth noting... you do not need to keep your eyes locked to his throughout the entire process... that is just a recipe for a sore neck... and after all  he will likely be looking to the heavens at least some of the time… and an occasional “penetrating glance”... maybe even with an added grin of “pleasure” at key moments will easily help put him over the top.

Another man said he loves...

“When a woman takes me really deep into her throat  while looking straight into my eyes... very sexy... very powerful.”

This is an “important way” to deliver a “powerful experience!”

Letting Him Ejaculate In Your Mouth Or Better Yet… Swallowing...

This one probably does not surprise you... and “cumming in your mouth” is not as simple as just “dominance” or pornographically inspired raunchiness... what on the surface might seem like lewd “sexuality”... underneath is another sign of your willingness to “surrender” and “give to him”... and even beyond that... it is a “form of extraordinarily deep trust and acceptance.”

You are giving him a “forbidden permission”... and it is this “permission” that is at the core of why this is such a "turn on"... a lot of men said that getting to “cum in her mouth” is like the “icing on the cake”... and do not ever underestimate the "power" of this "blow job classic"... it is a “visceral release” that men want you to take part in with them.

One man summed it up by saying...

“Her allowing me to cum in her mouth... or on her face... is the icing on the cake... even if she does not swallow it is so GREAT... it kinda gives the impression that she is a little slutty... and that she really enjoys sucking cock and giving me pleasure as much as I enjoy receiving it... and as much as I enjoy going down on her.”

If you have not let him come in your mouth yet... you might be “pleasantly surprised” how much you will “enjoy it too” if you “remain present” to the “power of the act”... and if you find the taste to be unpleasant there are many people who swear by pineapple juice as the remedy.

Deep Throat...

Here is another one that you probably know would make the list... and while some women say that if he wants to get it all the way in somewhere.. why not just have intercourse?

They miss the larger point... as one man said...

“Even with deep throating... it is not even really about the technique.. it just sends the message..  this is how much I want to please you... I will even do this.”

And of course it feels very good too... no need to hurt yourself of course...there is a wide variety of penis sizes out there... and different gag reflex sensitivities too...the “big trick” is to “deeply relax”... and breath slowly and calmly through your nose... do not hold your breath... holding your breath will trigger your throat to constrict.

You may also find that if your mouth or lips become dry during ”oral sex” that taking him as deep as you comfortably can while “relaxing your throat” will trigger you to produce a lot more saliva... this is especially useful for getting “him wet enough” to use your “hand” at the same time… and as I mentioned above... if he “closes his eyes”... he will “enjoy your hand” as much or more than the “deep throat.”

Play Balls...

While there is plenty of variety to be had in playing with the cock itself... venturing further afield is a “big pleasure booster”... as one man says...

“My cock in her mouth... her hands holding my balls...  and a finger in my ass... massaging my prostate... drives me insane with pleasure.”

Fortunate man to have a highly coordinated... ambidextrous girlfriend... the skin of the scrotum... the perineum... which is between the scrotum and anus... and the area around the anus are all packed with “sensitive nerve endings”... and most men will be “powerfully aroused” if you pay them some attention with “lips” and “tongue” and “caress” with your “finger tips”... if you are “feeling adventurous”... you can use your hand on his cock at the same time.

One man recommended that his top experience is when...

“My woman sucks me until I cum in her mouth...  and during the sucking she never puts a hand near my balls... and as I am cumming... just at that moment she reaches down and grabs my balls... I feel like I have been shot into outer space when she does this.”

I probably do not need to mention this... yet just in case... “be gentle with the balls”... if you are new to this area... starting slowly is a very good idea.

Tongue Techniques...

Your “tongue” is an invaluable tool in giving great “oral sex”... the moisture of the tongues saliva... the textured surface,...combined with its soft but muscular probing gets a lot of applause from the men...

“Oh God... her tongue motion really got me close to cumming more than anything... especially when she rotated the head of my cock in her mouth like a joy stick... in a circular motion,”

Commented one man.

Gently “licking up and down the shaft” or “around the head” are great ways of adding a little “variety” and “spice” to the usual “in out motion”... you might pay “special attention” to the frenulum...the area on the bottom side of the penis right where the shaft joins the head... which is the most “sensitive surface” on the entire penis.



This is a BIG ONE with an impressive number of men... the “wild card” is a big favourite... of course it has nothing to do with technique and more to do with “excitement”… no matter what your “physical skills” may be.... any woman can pull this one off if she has got a little “creativity”... “confidence” and “loves” walking the “wild side” her self!

Men “love it” when you take the “initiative” from time to time... they also “love surprises”… just like you do... how “wild” you want to be in your “choice of setting” for your “surprise” is something you can have a “fun time” figuring out for yourself... even the most basic... “no risk gestures” can be “big fun for him”... as this man mentions...

“My best experiences have been spontaneous moments... sometimes with no prompting at all... for example... sitting watching TV and a passionate kiss turns into oral sex.”

And another man said...

“Waking up in the morning to a BJ.”

One man said about his favourite blowjob experience... 

The most memorable... though probably not the safest...is while driving... my girlfriend will do it to me from time to time... usually at night when driving down an empty road... it is just kind of a rush doing it in public... and also somewhat of a tease since you do not have any control over what she does and you cannot see what she’s doing.”

And just so that my lawyer can sleep safely at night... let me make it clear that this is NOT an “oral sex” technique that I endorse... for obvious “legal reasons”... please do “drive safely”... you are more than likely to cause an accident... and that is “definitely unsafe sex”... there are plenty of safer venues to pop your surprise... the backyard... the back row of a movie theatre... the storage closet at work... a dressing room at the mall... play in your “imagination!”

Or forget the quirky locations... “timing” can be just as “powerful”... surprise him at any number of “potential moments” around your home... and he will “love you” for both the “thought” and the “pleasure.”

And I will conclude this article with this thought...

The more “extreme” and the more “expressed” that “passion” is... the more unbearable does life seem without it... it reminds us that if “passion dies” or is “denied”... we are “partly dead” and that soon... come what may... we will be wholly so... “living dead.”

Never lose your “passion” in your “love”... it is “loves”... ROCKET FUEL!

As always... leave a man or woman all the better for knowing you.

Yours Sincerely

Ange is an  Author... Speaker... and International Peak Performance Personal Development Consultant... and Psycho Dynamic Counsellor who works with men... and women who desire to develop themselves and their relationships to become Dynamic Lifers from around the World!

Recommended Further Reading...

3 “O”s For Oral Expertise With Your Man 

By Ange Fonce

The wonderful... scary... sexy... intriguing... and difficult thing about going down on your partner is that there is so much psychological and emotional energy there.

Some women “love” to go down on their partners... while some women find it unpleasant... and some women just have an uneasy relationship with oral sex.
Likewise there are some men who think it is the very best part of making love and some men who do not like it all.


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How To Inspire Your Man To Passion In 3 Easy Steps.

By Ange Fonce

You want him to be passionate.  
You want a man who is on his course and who knows what he wants, and knows he wants YOU.
You want to be ravaged, and tenderly held, and to be the object of his ravenous desire.
Also, along the way, you probably want a deep and trusting and loving relationship.
And the good news is that the best way to get his PASSION also turns out to be the best way to build that trusting and loving relationship.
Here's the d...

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Sex Talk, Dirty Talk, Sexual Fantasy & Identity.
Are You Alive in ALL Your Passion?

By Ange Fonce

Should you TALK during sex?
If so, what do you say?

And what about phone-sex?
Or just leaning in to your man during a party and whispering something naughty in his ear that is guaranteed to get him to make apologies to the host and drag you home?
Here are a couple of questions I got from readers that got me thinking about the subject:
"Dear Ange,
Do you know any good resources for "learning" about phone sex.  I'...

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Masculine Men and Feminine Women know and are the EXCEPTIONS!

They are truly Passionate and DYNAMIC Lovers!

Please feel free to forward this article to a friend... or let them know they can receive their own articles by subscribing to The Tribe of Dynamic Lifers The Intimate Communion Magazine... I am sure they will "appreciate" your consideration of them.